If you come to the meditation practice thinking to yourself, “This won’t work but I’ll do it anyway,” the chances are it will not be very helpful. The first time you feel any pain or discomfort, you will be able to say to yourself, “See, I knew my pain wouldn’t go away,” or “I knew I wouldn’t be able to concentrate,” and that will confirm your suspicion that it wasn’t going to work and you will drop it.
If you come as a “true believer,” certain that this is the right path for you, that meditation is “the answer,” the chances are you will soon become disappointed too. As soon as you find that you are the same person you always were and that this work requires effort and consistency and not just a romantic belief in the value of meditation or relaxation, you may find yourself with considerably less enthusiasm than before. …[W]e find that those people who come with a skeptical but open attitude do the best.
From “Full Catastrophe Living: Using the Wisdom of Your Body and Mind to Face Stress, Pain, and Illness” by Jon Kabat-Zinn
moving to austin alone was the first time i feel like i ever really took a chance, and it was the best thing i could have ever done for myself.
a thought on relationships..
i’m learning that they’re not always perfect. some days aren’t exciting. some days it feels like you and your love don’t have anything to talk about. some days you just tell them how your day went, they tell you how theirs went, and then that’s kinda it. some days you fight, and it might get better the next day but it might not. some days you wonder if you and that person are right for each other, you wonder if you’ll be happy forever (forever) like you both planned. sometimes you have doubts.
but i think those days happen to everyone after a while. and i think they’re okay. sometimes you run into some rough spots, and it might take a few days to get over it. but then they say something surprising that makes you laugh, and they tell you how much they like your laugh. and you look through your photo library and you see an old picture of them from when you first fell in love. and you remember that the bad times always pass. & it’s so worth it.